Saturday, January 5, 2008

50 Ways to Say No To Sex and 50 Ways to Get Around Them

Bullshit I say they hand out papers with ways to say no to sex. Being the nice guy I am I came up with way to get around each of those sayings. Some of these were actually taken from the paper given. Ways to Say No to Sex and ways to get around them. I just had my hair done Giving me a blow job won t mess your hair up at all. I don t feel good. You know they say eating penis helps with sickness. I don t want to get pregnant. You can t get pregnant from a little anal. Don t you respect me I ll do more than respect you if you ll spread em. Ok you might want to just punch her and rape for this one. I want my first time to be special. We can break out the furry handcuffs if that ll suit you. I want to wait until I m married. Good one married couples don t fuck. I m not attracted to you like that. Would you like another beer . I don t want an STD Trust me I don t have a green dick. Go to hell I will after I go to heaven that is if you ll take me there. I ! have to take a shower. Awesome you know how to have fun. My mother would kill me. Fine I ll bang her too so she don t get jealous. I have a boyfriend he ll be mad. Your boyfriend is cheating on you. I know it hurts to hear but I can make it all better. If you loved me you d wait until I was ready. No if you loved me you d do anything for me. We can have fun without having sex. Yes I could have fun without playing hockey but that don t stop me from playing it. This isn t the right place. Ok my house isn t far away. I have things to do. I have a headache. I ll be ready in about minutes. My car needs washed. Oh good I ve never had sex in an automatic car wash before. I d feel slutty So you probably should. Ok get a power nap and I ll watch TV till you get back. I have to take my clothes to the laundromat. Well aren t you going to need something fun to do while they wash . I m meeting my friends tonight for dinner. are your friends attractive . Sorry bye le! aves Catches with rope. You know the drill. Sorry I m meeting the Epic tonight. Ok there really is nothing that will keep a woman from seeing me. I would much rather go out for dinner. Ok how about after that . Can t we do something else Yes but that s not the point. My favorite TV show is on. You have Tivo bitch. How about eating a really big wiener . I have too much respect for myself to have sex at an early age. I respect you enough to want in your pants. There s a good movie playing tonight. Yeah a nice dark place. No I hate you. Well you can hate me and punish my peter any day of the week. I m not in the mood. Would you like a beer . Mommy the strange man is scaring me. Listen I have Jolly Ranchers just get in the god damned van. I m late for work. Well since you re already in trouble you may as well have fun before you get yelled at. What do you think I am some cheap slut Ok maybe was a little low how about . I just took a shower. But I bet you didn t take a golden shower. I appriciate dinner but that doesn t mea! n I ll have sex with you. Waiter seperate checks please. Hold on I have a phone call. That s why they invented voicemail. I m a nun. Ok why you d hit on a nun evades me but oh well. It s that time of the month. I m old enough to be your grandmother. But you re not my grandmother so it s all good. What if my daughter walks in I m thinking we can keep this all in the family. Those people will be able to see us. I don t want you to think I m easy. I don t care if you are you re making my penis hard. Lets go golfing instead. If we get lost in the wood I ll let you wash my balls. I can t turn down a round of golf. All you men care about is sex. That s right all of my caring is spent towards you. Don t you love me . Turn off the lights there will be no difference between me and the strap on. ways you ll be having sex in no time. You can visit by going to theepiczone. Feel free to use this article on a site or in a newsletter but make sure to link to theepiczon! e. com and give proper credit. You can contact The Epic at theepictheepiczone.

Source: http://luxmob.com/archives/2008/01/04/50-ways-to-say-no-to-sex-and-50-ways-to-get-around-them/


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